Thursday, September 13, 2012

Look inside yourself


I need to be skinnier to love myself. I just shared that on my page, and it got me thinking. I'm guilty of this, I think most girls/women (men even?) are. We are 5 lbs over, 10 lbs, 50 lbs over what we 'think' is our ideal weight, or we are not the shape we wish we were.

What's surprising to me, is how often someone will express their unhappiness with their own weight - and so many of us immediately argue with them. We tell them they're nuts! They aren't "fat" or aren't as overweight as they think. This tells me that more often than not, its our self image- not 100% our weight, and this is sad to me. There is an awesome website called My Body Gallery FULL of every height, weight, size woman you can think of. You punch in your own specs and it shows you what you really look like (or close to it). Check it out- I am willing to bet you will be surprised and think "wow, those women don't look as bad as I picture myself looking".

Everyone wants to be healthy. Everyone wants to be desirable, looked up to, respected. This is not the definition of skinny or thin. You can carry a few extra pounds and be attractive, sexy, respected, desired, loved.

One person, who we all know and love, that does not let their body interfere with their happiness- is Logan. We can all learn something from him about this. Logan was a failure to thrive baby/toddler. He was extremely underweight for almost 5 yrs. We worked hard to bulk him up, and eventually he turned the corner and the weight started to go the other way. Nobody can say if this was due to an undiagnosed genetic condition, and it can be frustrating. He eats well, not a health food nut by any means, but not a junk food junkie. He likes fruits, vegetables, fish etc. He drinks water. He is extremely active. He is just very overweight. But he is unaffected by this (for the most part).

He will go to the beach- strip his shirt off- and bound down the sand to the water- totally uninhibited. I envy that in him. I wish I could do that. He has a confidence- regardless of his weight- and I think this is his innocence coming into play. He has not been bombarded by the messages that we have in our society. You HAVE to be thin. You HAVE to be fit. You HAVE to be the ideal- for people to like/love/want/respect you. He doesn't have any of these emotional seeds planted in his head. He likes people if they are nice, if they treat him well- not if they are in shape- so he expects the same out of us. He has no shame in his game, it does not cross his mind that someone may judge him based on his appearance.

If you are kind, smart, respectful, loving- shouldn't that be enough? Don't live every day wishing you were thinner. Thinner does not mean better. It's a mental/emotional trap set by beauty standards that 98% of us cannot live up to. That's why we're not all supermodels, we're not all on the covers of magazines. Don't live in a "I'm too fat for that" fog. Get out there and enjoy your life. You loved to swim as a kid but now despise bathing suit season? Find a beach where nobody knows you- and let it fly! The feeling is liberating. You used to work out but now feel like a chubs on the treadmill? Go to the gym if you want- and hold your head high. You're there for you and your health, not to achieve the gym bunny on the elliptical's physique, or to impress the buff guy bench pressing. Don't let them intimidate you- you are NOT LESS than them. You are waiting to reward your weight loss with a new outfit? Buy it now! When you look good, you feel good. If you are intent on losing weight and getting in better shape- that's awesome! But feel good while you're doing it, don't beat yourself up. Keep your chin up, and your spirits will stay up.

Love your heart. Love your soul. Love your intelligence. Love your sense of humor. Love your loyalty to your family. Love yourself- no matter what shape/size/weight. You matter, you're worth it.