The year is 1989. I am 15 almost 16, in my Junior year of high school. The first day of school is always nerve wracking, and this is no different. Where will my classes be? Will my friends be in them? 4th period is US History with Mr. Connolly. Blech. Always hated History. I walk in, pick a seat and look around....He walks in...2 yrs older...I've had a crush for almost 3 yrs but I have a boyfriend. He picks the seat next to me and smiles...Seth..*sigh*.
We shared the class for a couple of months and I had a terrible break-up with my boyfriend. It was a kid relationship, and the end was typical. After a few days Seth leaned over and asked me out. Whoa..Umm yes?
Friday night we went out. He was sweet. He asked to hold my hand. The rest is history..
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| Prom 1990 |
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| Seth drove a gorgeous 69' Chevy Chevelle SS with a 427 big block- I learned to drive on it |
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| I got a rose and a love note every Saturday for years |
I have so many 'firsts', so many milestones, so many memories with Seth. Prom, driving, first car, first real job, weddings, deaths, births. I have had his last name longer than I had my maiden name. 20 years. I still can't even believe it when I say it out loud. 20. years.
I'm often asked what our secret is, and I really just think we can't live without each other. It hasn't always been a fairytale, believe me, there have been some rough parts, but if I was struggling, he wouldn't give up on me, if he was - I gave him the same effort. Space to grow, respect, and effort. I think that's about it.
Obviously being 15 and 17 when we started our relationship, we've grown into completely different people now. I think that's been an important part, letting each other explore life, change what needed to be changed, mature, grow. I think for some people it can be scary to see a spouse change, but when you get together so young it has to happen.
Forgiveness. Another key part. We all screw up, its going to happen. Nobody is perfect. We say things we don't mean, we hurt each other. You have to be willing to let it go, not hold a grudge. Say sorry and mean it, and forgive and mean it. This has been the hardest part to master, but I think we've got it down...we try to learn from mistakes and don't repeat them.
I would like to thank my husband for being there for me, at times when I didn't want to be there for myself. Caring about my problems when he probably didn't want to deal with them. Helping me grow into an independent survivor, a loving mother and a strong woman. Letting me spread my wings and fly, but always come back to the nest. Keeping me grounded, when my head was in the clouds and my eyes were full of stars. Making me see whats important, and what to kick aside. Teaching me about true love, and genuine commitment to each other, to our children and to myself. Thank you for being you, and doing all you do for me. I couldn't do this without you, and I wouldn't want to. Thank you for a wonderful 20 yrs, and hopefully many, many more.
